Oh my goodness! Let me just tell you what it is like to have a beautiful teenage daughter! It's pretty stinkin' crazy honestly! I have a darling 17 year old daughter. She is of course "well liked" by the boys. Somehow this really leaves her feeling used and humiliated. I have asked my self this question so many times since she turned 16 I have lost count.....How can someone SO smart and SO mature in so many ways, Be SO stupid when it comes to boys? I could honestly write an ENTIRE blog on the things boys have said to her in the last 18 months! It would shock you!
I think I finally figured this out.
Here is the scenerio~ repeatedly!
Boy asks her out. They go on about 3 dates. They text. They flirt. They hold hands. They hug........They kiss. BAM! She doesn't hear from them again or if she does hear from them, it is days or weeks later with a dozen excuses as to why they haven't contacted her..........All of them having to do with the fact that she expected too much or she was too serious. Before you think she is guilty of all those things let me give you an idea of the things that were said to her leading up to this. " I need you. I miss you. I want you." So a girl is lured in with words and flattery. They pursue her and her company and when they kiss her a few times they are gone with out an explanation. She feels used. She say's
"mom, what's wrong with me?" I say NOTHING..........but you need to stop letting them kiss you!
SO our latest is this summer. She goes to Youth conference. Meets a kid there. He pursues her. I say don't kiss him. So she doesn't and guess what???? She listens to me! She doesn't kiss him! Is he still pursuing her? Kind of, but he is also pursuing another girl in our neighborhood. I say don't you kiss him unless her earns your trust. Makes you feel like he isn't just gonna mark you on his list of kisses and move onto the next girl. She is learning! She is listening! I think I might respect this kid if he lets it all go knowing he doesn't really want anyting from her instead of Playing her like a lot of the guys who have come around these last 18 months.
I say, Flirt! Have fun! Don't get too sad over boys! I also say......stop kissing boys that don't really care about you!
She does not want a serious boyfriend. She also just wants to be treated like she means something special to someone who says sweet things to her. She has developed some trust issues for sure.
I have a 14 year old boy...............Heaven Help me when he likes girls! Please help me to direct his paths for good :D
NOT all girls are stupid. Not all boys are scum.
Oh geeze. I do not want my girls to grow up. I think you are giving her sound advice. She is so young, that it is good that you are encouraging her not to get serious. ~S
ReplyDelete